Friday, 29 May 2009

TIDINESS IS NEXT TO GODLINESS

I didn't know this before, but apparently it can help in your defence for the crime of putting your mum's dead body in the freezer for twenty years if you keep your garden 'in pristine condition'. 
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12 comments:

Zoë said...

Wonder what you could get knocked off if I composted her instead? So much more Eco friendly than 20 years of eleccy, and good for the garden too.

29 May 2009 at 16:27
VP said...

It's that tiny little detail quoted that makes our Press what it is ;)

29 May 2009 at 16:58
HappyMouffetard said...

My neighbours can sleep soundly in their beds knowing that I'm too untidy to have dead bodies in my freezer, then. There may, however, be a few bodies strangled by fast-growing bindweed in the borders though.

29 May 2009 at 18:59
emmat said...

This article has only gone to increase my suspicion of people whose gardens are just toooooo tidy

29 May 2009 at 19:56
Elaine said...

This reminds me of my favourite ever overheard remark, at local swimming pool, as follows:

"My mother in law rang me last night and asked me, 'Darling, I've had a placenta in my freezer for absolutely ages, is it one of yours?' I told her that, no, all of mine are underneath the roses."

Am in awe of someone who can have unknown placentas in her freezer...

29 May 2009 at 22:38
Juliet said...

That is really funny - must tell J-Ro (she is always trying to compost people - sometimes she even waits until they're dead - but as Zoe says, much more sensible than freezing them!).

Elaine :o

29 May 2009 at 23:07
Victoria Summerley said...

i wonder what alerted the neighbour? Maybe the neatly kept gravestone in the front garden was a bit of a giveaway...

29 May 2009 at 23:16
colleen said...

I defrosted my freezer this week for the first time ever. There were some very strange things in there including a bag of baby octupi, my old panda, a knitted scarecrow and a bag of wool (think moth). No humans. But then I don't live in Sidcup. Say no more...

29 May 2009 at 23:29
Arabella Sock said...

We have a very small freezer - I'm not allowed to make jokes about who might fit in it any more.

30 May 2009 at 11:43
Yolanda Elizabet Heuzen said...

20 years in a freezer and it never broke down? No power shortage either? Colour me amazed! Does anybody know what brand that freezer is, gotta have one too. ;-)

Yup, keep your garden pristine and you can get away with murder. Off to tidy up my garden!

2 June 2009 at 13:54
LittleGreenFingers said...

I am still recovering from that placenta eavesdropped conversation...

4 June 2009 at 15:44
Mr. McGregor's Daughter said...

Dang! I guess I'd better go clean up the garden right now.

5 June 2009 at 19:00

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