GOJI CRIME ON THE UP

New issue of The Garden arrived today, with big balls on the front cover (fnarr fnarr). 

The first news item concerns the on-going Scandal of the Illegal Goji Berry Bushes. It doesn't make any sense though. The story tells that a "government spokesman" advised that plants not of European origin be disposed of in household waste. 

This is because Goji plants from outside the EU could be infected with viruses that could spread easily to other members of the Solanaceae -  potatoes and tomatoes to you and me.

Yet the real picture seems more complex than this solution suggests. Many gardeners bought their bushes from reputable firms in this country (and even got given them as part of a subscription offer to Grow Your Own). But the reputable UK firms had bought from Dutch wholesalers, who had bought from illegal importers. Confused? I was. 

Still I can't help thinking this is a giant storm in an over-sized Goji Tea cup. Especially after reading the debate about it on the messageboards (scroll down to the bottom for the fairly final word on the matter from SMS6). 

In the small print, even The Garden admits "the risk of spread is described as relatively low".

Given that Goji berries are being grown by, ooooh, about 0.00007% of the horticultural public, does this really deserve to be the lead news item in the RHS mag? Is it just a case of someone trying to rustle up a drama - when there really isn't one? 

GOJOE BERRIES

Whilst we might quake in our shoes at the idea of stepping into the ring with the titanic Wilson, we have less trouble with the idea of watching our guy take on Old Man's Beardshaw.


Although, admittedly, Beardie does know quite a lot about plants.


And, he is televisually appealing.


And, now I think about it, he can fly.


Hmm. Maybe we should take him a bit more seriously as a threat. Especially now the Mighty Sock has thrown her 40% woollen weight behind his campaign, choosing the Dahlia as her campaign flower.


We feel here at JSHQ that the only possible response is for us to urge Swift supporters to adorn themselves in Goji berries. As all faithful Joe-watchers will know, Goji are just one of the unique vegetational choices our hero has picked to grow on his allotment.
"They're full of anti-oxidants," he cried.

"Hurray!" we all replied. "Let's wear them braided into our hair until such day as the BBC recognises the inherently greater worth of Mr Joe 'Excellent' Swift!"