Friday 4 July 2008

THE MATTHEW PASSION


I just got the new issue of Gardens Illustrated and I'm amazed to find that Mateus "Darcy" Wilson has written practically the entire magazine. 

How did this come about? Did Juliet Roberts have an editorial meeting where she went, "Hmm, we need someone to do a thing about meadows. I know: Matthew." 

Then five minutes later they were like "Hmmm, we need someone to go and meet this gardener in Yorkshire. I know: Matthew!"


Did they think we just wouldn't notice, because he's so really really ridiculously good-looking? 

I'm not actually complaining. My only problem with it (and obviously, I'm saying this on behalf of others and not myself) is that they have twelve pages of the magazine devoted to his writing without a single proper picture of him. All over the country there will be girls opening the mag and experiencing the same sense of disappointment as my friend Alex, when he got all lecherously excited that a new Cameron Diaz film was coming out, entitled "Shrek".

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yes but what song should we be singing?

VP said...

Mateus could have least done a GW Adam Pascoe and done the 'how to' photo shoot. Instead we got a young lad in a hat. Deeply disappointing. Hrrumph.

emmat said...

I was thinking more of some winsome shots of him actually lying in the meadow. But, you know, whatever turns you on.

Arabella Sock said...

I just bought it on your recommendation and would like to complain about the lack of Wislon pictures. Furthermore the Bedsock let me down badly by when being asked for money by a nice young man selling The Big Issue replied "Not after spending £3.85 on a gardening magazine!"